Fantasies

A pillow case full of tears
A mind full of suicidal thoughts
I try, I try n I try
For every Angel there is a Demon
I am that demon
Your worst nightmare
My fucken fantasy
Chains, blood, bruises, blades and death by my side
Your existence
The only thing keeping me alive
In reality I smile, I laugh and shower you with love
In my fantasy I’m drowning your head in a toilet
In my fantasy you’re all chained up, blood oozing from your eyes, an eyeball in a spoon, blood drips from my wrists
I need someone to wake me up
Bring me back to reality
Wake me up
Awaken in a dark room and my head with a train of thoughts

I remember a friend of mine telling me that artists are the God of their canvases and that it is basically a coping mechanism ;He also said that artists are able to kill in their drawings…

Story of A Fallen Angel 🥀

: ([Fallen Angel ] I am my demon)

Fallen Angel
Your words mean nothing to me
You had me convinced that you were different
Yet here I am with a broken heart
Fragile it was, and you broke it into a million pieces
I’ve come to realize that you are no different
Each day I replay words and omnibus of what you did
You took a part of me that I cannot regain
I had given you my heart, body, mind and soul
The sweet words and the charming remarks when we were in public
But behind closed doors
Behind closed doors
You grabbed me by the neck
And pushed me against the wall
You said everything is going to be okay
You tore my clothes apart and stripped me naked
You broke me
You turned me against the world
And now here I am
Angry at the world
A hopeless being
Your sorries mean nothing to me
Today here I am… Not a victim but a survivor
Living proof of your selfishness
I am a Fallen Angel

I’d rather


I mean being close to Death is just like falling for you
I mean I’d rather fall from the highest building but not for you
Falling for you would turn me into an addict of some sort
I hate that I want you so bad but I can’t be with you
I hate to not have your attention
A life without you is like a dreamer with no dreams
I’d rather be hated than to fall for you
Sometimes I wish I never met you thou you brought optimism into my life
The amount of emotional satisfaction and frustration you give me
Right now I’d rather be a nobody to everyone than a somebody to you

Yours truly

Mbali🥀